I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Randomize
