I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
