who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize
