When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize