I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
