hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
