I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
