We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize