She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
