I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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