How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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