would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
is wine microwaveable?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Can I color on your dick again?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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