I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
