dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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