Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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