even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
