The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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