I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
We got so high we made milksteak
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
