You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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