i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
