we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
