hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
