whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
