She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
