Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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