god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Randomize
