she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
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