The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
