Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize