I want to stick my p in your. b.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
