i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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