It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
third nipple confirmed
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize