when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
