In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
