So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
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