we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
