Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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