Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
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