It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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