You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
