Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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