Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
