You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
