Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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