I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
