Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
