and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
