I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
