So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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