So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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